


Twisted Realities of the Heart

by Freya1970



Category: Classic Doctor Who, Doctor Who
Genre: F/M, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-01
Packaged: 2018-05-11 01:45:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5609200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freya1970/pseuds/Freya1970
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes one shouldn't go exploring in old haunted houses. But who ever said he'd back down from a challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Round and Round

The Doctor stared at the phenomenon before him. Whirls of space-time tweeted reality in several time periods. He didn’t know if new boy could see it but he certainly did. It had twisted itself until now he faced this decision as to whether or not he would go forward with his plan and essentially step into a gravity well.  
  
“You can’t go in there! You’ll be ripped apart!” His new companion. He guessed that what he was. He had followed him around the house all weekend and even traveled back in time to see if they could pinpoint when this gravity well had begun to tear at reality. It had all started a thousand years ago when this house was nothing more than a green plain. It had all begun.  
  
“What do you know, new boy?” The Doctor said failing to remember his name. That’s how new this so-called ghost chaser was to his company. A scientist exploring the quasi-science of the spiritual phenomenon as it was related earth based 21st Century physics. New Boy though was using atmospheric measurements, and stupidly quasi-recorders to ‘listen’ for spirits.

  
“My name is Sage, sir. Not new boy or hey-you-with the-whack-mo-instruments. Sage Peterson. S.A.G.E. Peterson.”   
  
_“Doctor…help me! I know you can hear me.”_  
  
“See, I told you she knew you were here!” Sage turned from where he had been and kneeled next to his detection equipment. “Do you know her?”

  
“Yes, and she won’t be jubilant that I wasted all, this time, standing here.” The Doctor was being completely honest with the Sage boy.

  
“I really think you should find another way, Doctor. The gravity well isn’t some amusement ride.”  
  
Flashes of emotions went through his mind. He felt that something was missing from them. Like broadcast signals with no words or pictures. Just static with a hint of something flashing across the screen every now and again in the form of feelings. Some vague memory of someone telling him the danger would be worth it. But he couldn’t put a memory to a face. Just darkness and a sense of deja vu of encouragement. The Doctor snapped on the stabilizing field coil that he was wearing on his wrist. He felt the field stabilize around him. He made sure that the twin bracelet was seated firmly in his pocket. It was.  
  
He turned to Sage then. “I’m a Time Lord, and this is an amusement ride for me.”  
  
The Doctor pulled his attention to the curious corner of the room and walked right into the gravity well.  
  
Realty spun like a reality kaleidoscope on the verge of breaking from a child’s receiving endless delight from the toy. It was reality and insanity packaged into one existence. The Doctor looked at the field coil strapped to his arm. He had twenty minutes left. No time to save every one of these poor souls. Time was running out to save the one he’d come to fetch.  
  
She was diminishing. Growing weaker. Time was of the essence.  
  
The Doctor closed his eyes and separated the voices until all that remain was hers.  
  
“It’s about time you showed up to rescue me from this horrible existence.”  
Her grateful for his company? Never. He knew that she’d find fault with him.  
  
“I thought you didn’t believe in knight errants.”  
  
The Doctor opened his eyes and prayed to the guardians of time and space that she would just shut up and let him rescue her in peace. Was that too much to ask?  
  
“I don’t, but I tried everything else, including getting that nutcase who keeps coming back to go to UNIT for help! But did he listen?” she huffed.  
  
“Of course, he did,” he exclaimed shrilly. She was sulking. As if he were to blame for this mess. _But it is your fault._ You pressed the button that created the gravity well in the first place! However, she didn’t need to know that, did she? “That’s why I’m here. UNIT contacted the TARDIS.”  
  
“Oh so you do have some secret cult following?! I thought it was all a rumor. I thought it was the military.”  
  
The Doctor only got close enough to put the bracelet on her wrist. He shouldn’t get closer to her when she was this mad. “It’s not a cult. It’s an extremely secretive organization that fights alien. Well, only when necessary, of course.”  
  
She gave him that look. The one that made him die a little inside. Yes, she was not pleased that he had kept that information from her though he was sure the memory existed that he had let on at one point in their adventures it had existed. He grabbed her hand and forced her tore her out of the reality she was stuck.  
  
She was talking again. At least, the background noise of walking through millions of realities drowned out any more of her complaints. He propelled them forward until they were standing in the darkness of the old home on Broad St. She glanced around the small room as if she’d never seen it before.  
  
Sage stood up and suddenly became a grinning idiot. “You’re the one who contacted me!” Sage’s enthusiasm made the Doctor roll his eyes. “My name is Sage Peterson. I’m a ghost hunter!”  
  
There it was. That smile and expression that said ‘I won’t harm you. Only the Doctor…not you, though. You’re not an idiot like the Doctor is’.  
  
“I’m Tegan Jovanka. Uh…retired air hostess and his former.,..”  
  
“Yes, yes,” the Doctor broke into the conversation. Tegan was still looking around the place as if she was looking for something misplaced.  
  
“This place is creepy,” she proclaimed as if her word had anything to do with future reviews of this decrepit old house. “How did I end up here? I was on my way to Heathrow to catch a flight out for my cousin’s anniversary celebration in Sydney.”  
  
_Why_ Heathrow _? Why not somewhere else? If she accused him of losing her job, this time, he’d leave right where she stood!_    
  
“The gravity well,” Sage pointed back towards the room they had just exited. “It works like the Bermuda Triangle. It sucks people up from all different places and times from all over the world and stores them in there.”  
  
“It is the Bermuda Triangle.” How many times must he correct new boy about what the gravity well was?!  
  
“Well that explains Amelia Earhart being in there then,” Tegan said almost nonchalantly.  
  
Sage’s eyes bugged. “She’s really in there?!”  
  
“Yeah, so is her creepy navigator. He always hit on me every time he came around for his visit.”  
  
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Oh so he gets himself, and Earhart lost in a gravity bubble, and he’s just creepy?”  
  
Tegan nodded. “Yeah, so what? It’s not like he tried to get me back to Heathrow for over a year only ending up there when we didn’t want to be.”  
  
There it was. She was pouring salt on that old wound. It was more like taking a scalpel to it and slicing it open without any painkillers and sticking a rusty nail in it. _And then pouring salt on it._  
  
Sage laughed. The Doctor could tell he was laughing at them and not them individually. His eyes were shifting back and forth. “Do you think this is a comedy routine, new boy?”  
  
  
“No…no, nothing like that. It just the two of you reminds me of my Mum and Dad. Always bickering about some nonsense and seeing who could outlast the other.” The fool was still laughing.  
  
The Doctor looked at Tegan. And Tegan looked at him. And they burst out laughing at the same time. “Us? In a relationship?” Tegan said through her laughter. “Why, I don’t even think he has a penis.”  
  
Tegan walked ahead outside trying to steady herself as she continued to laugh uncontrollably.  
  
Sage’s laughing died down and began to stare at the Doctor. The Doctor stopped laughing and stared back at Sage. “Just between the two of us. Do you…”  
  
“I’m not going to grace that question with an answer.” It would be the only thing the Doctor would say on the matter to Sage Peterson. The Doctor turned away from Sage and headed out the door.


	2. Cut Off

“Are you certain you won’t change your mind, Sage, and come with us?” It was a common enough offer. One he only made for people who appeared to be lost or needed a nudge towards self-discovery. Or a reluctant stowaway. He glared at Tegan when that last thought had formed in his mind.  
  
“No, I think I’ll try to figure out a way to help more people out of that gravity bubble. It’ll take some work, but I’m sure UNIT would be happy to help me in my efforts.”  
  
Another stupid dreamer. He lost more goods that way. Well, he wouldn’t tell him it was impossible. Not with Tegan around to argue the opposite only because she would goad him into another argument. Of course, the young fool would succeed. It was all written in history. And that part of the story was already written on Sage’s timeline. Earnhart would find another way to lose herself again, though. The never ending cycle of irony would never end for that woman in all the ages to come.  
  
“And you, Tegan?” _Please say no! Please just let what’s his name drive you to Heathrow. For the love of all of time and space say..._  
  
“Of course. You think I am going to let a space bubble get between me and celebrating my cousin’s wedding anniversary?”  
  
The Doctor looked skywards while Tegan and Sage exchanged goodbyes. _This has to be the work of the Black Guardian or someone just as someone nefarious. Somewhere he was sure the Master was even laughing at his ill fate._  
  
The Doctor fiddled with the controls on the TARDIS console while  
  
Tegan closed the doors to the TARDIS behind her. “So Sydney, and what year?”  
  
Tegan looked at him as if he knew. “2005, of course.”  
  
The Doctor sighed. He ran his hands over his face in a failed attempt to calm himself. Panic bubbled to the surface.  
  
“Are you certain it was 2005 when you left?” Please, oh, please let her remember that’s she no less than six months from the past. Please Lord Rassilon… If he had called upon that tyrant’s name then…yes, he was that desperate.  
  
“Yes, November 7, 2005. Why what’s the problem?”  
  
“Your stupid Earth rules! At least, the ones concerning the 20th and 21st centuries.”  
  
Tegan looked at him like he was mad. Maybe if he had left her behind he wouldn’t be in this mess! But he knew he couldn’t have done that. By Rassilon’s crooked teeth! She was connected to one of the greatest discoveries of the 21st century, and there was no way of fixing it!”  
  
“What stupid Earth rules?”  
  
There was no way around it. He had to tell her. Point blank. That’s how she liked her explanations.“Your dead, Tegan.”  
  
“Now wait a minute, I’m not…”  
  
“No! No! I mean not physically dead. I mean that dead on paper. Legally dead.”  
  
Tegan rolled her eyes. “I’ve been legally dead before. Twice. I have two headstones. Both on my parent’s farm. Thanks to you and your navigation skills.”  
  
Tegan was going to kill him. “Now you have three, and there is no coming back from being dead for ten years.”


	3. Question

“You can’t be sure! We have to go back!”  
  
Of course, she would say that. Why could she understand? And why didn’t he just make up a three strikes and you’re out rule to placate her? He could chalk it up to it being a fixed point in time. But that wasn’t the issue. “I am sure, Tegan. I’ve already looked it up three times and showed you! Going back, well…Amelia Earhart!” He tried to explain again.  
  
Tegan shrugged. “What about her?”   
  
“Look. Sage there saves Amelia Earhart. He brings her back to 2016 and a year later she disappears. It happens every time they find her again.”  
Tegan appeared almost to comprehend what he was saying. “Are you saying I’m going to disappear in a year?”  
  
“Yes, if you stay on Earth.”  
  
She looked at him accusingly crossing her arms in the process. “You’re making that up.”  
  
The Doctor sighed. Did she ever believe him? No. Never. “Now, why would I make that up?”   
  
“You know why.”   
  
The Doctor busied himself with some of the non-essential controls on the console. “I don’t because you won’t tell me.”  
  
She let out a frustrated sigh. “Fine. It’s your eyebrows. They are telepathically telling me your lying.”  
  
His eyebrows again. Delightful. Now they were communicating with the not-so-dead. “I’m not lying, Tegan, despite what you might think of my galactic warmongering eyebrows.”  
  
Was he cursed to have this creature on board the TARDIS for time eternal? He hoped not. That would complicate things. It wasn’t so much the Time Lords. It was more of the fact of the friction their two unyielding personalities created.   
  
Tegan was chewing on her thumbnail. A habit she must have picked up later in life. She looked as though she was looking for a weakness in his new form. “Well...”  
  
He was decided. He would take her to the Eye of Orion. His muddled mind could use a month long break. He could paint a portrait or maybe join in the sport of running Sunskaters. The possibilities were endless! At least, until she found him and demanded he light a fire at night. It got cold there at night. Would she do that? No, she’d probably start the fire herself. She had always claimed she was the rugged sort.   
  
“Well, what, Tegan?” He wished she would stop bothering him!  
  
“Well, have you a penis?”  
  
Oh, so she wasn't going to leave that subject alone. This incarnation of him was always inexplicably wily and enjoyed stoking the fires of carelessness. It’s why he walked into the gravity bubble to save her. He was always the one who pushed the envelope until it faltered. Perhaps, that’s why he answered her tremendously inappropriate question with: “How do you wish for me to respond your question?”   
  
Yes, he could have dodged or even ignored her question. But those games were old. And they only made Tegan more annoying. More persistent. From this point forward, he’d always be wondering if she was following him around until he finally broke down and waved his penis in her face like some child who had discovered that the male genitalia were flexible and that not everyone had one. He could do that to the ‘mistress’ one day.   
  
What a childish and abhorrent idea.   
  
Maybe he should do it then. Just to see if she missed having a penis.   
  
As usual, Tegan was full of good ideas. He turned his attention from his brief naughty introspective back to Tegan. She was either shocked or contemplating her answer given her silence on the subject. But knowing her as well as he did, he was about to get either brutishly slapped or trapped into something he would rather not spending time doing.   
  
Her eyes were narrowing, and a smug smile soon appeared on her face and her cheeks were becoming red.  
  
He knew it.   
  
She was going to slap him.


	4. Answer

It had only been a question. One that she and Nys had debated back and forth in the privacy of their room.  
    
_“It’s apparent that he identifies himself as male, Tegan. Of course, he has a penis.”_  
  
That was Nys’s logic. If you dress like a male, then one had a penis. Of course, there was no hard proof. No observations made to prove that the Doctor had one. He never seemed to need a bathroom break or a libido. It was all business and well, if it hadn’t been for that group of boys at the School for Bad Boys as she had dubbed it, who catcalled and whistled at her that time when they ended up with Turlough, she would have thought there was such as a thing as a libido anymore.  
   
Sex in the TARDIS…well, it was just absent.   
  
Yes, she had been immensely attracted to the Doctor. Yes, it made her want to open the TARDIS doors and leap out just to see if they could share a Hollywood moment. But, he always had been blind, deaf and completely unaware of that she wanted him. Craved him was more like it. But like the good companion, she followed Nyssa’s lead and tried to bury everything that would give rise to a seduction of the Doctor.  
  
Well, there you go. There’s an excellent title for a beautiful sci-fi, sex-filled novel, she thought.   _The Seduction of the Doctor._ Ha! What a tagline that would be. The human woman, Tegan, is madly in love with her Alien captor who has no libido and no penis. How will she cope?  
  
She knew what happened in that story. A lot of arguing. A lot of misunderstanding and a lot of ‘why don’t you just face it, you stupid man, and realize you’re in love with me and fuck me until I can’t walk! You have fingers and a tongue don’t you! Use those! I promise I won’t complain!   
  
Knowing the Doc though he’d probably think something was wrong with her like that one time he had knocked on the door of the bathroom, the one without the pool, and asked if she was well after she had climaxed in the shower. After that, for her sanity, she had stopped her silly thoughts about the clueless Time Lord.  
  
But the question remained unanswered, even after she left the TARDIS.   
Did he have a penis? Her imagination would always get the better of her of course. She even imagined it had eyes on it. That idea had cooled her libido so fast that the man she had been ready to shag lost out on a happy night.  
  
“And now you know.” From the sound of his voice, he was already half asleep next to her.  
  
Yes, she knew. Her whole body knew. Her legs knew. Everything about her knew now. Didn’t he know she was an old woman?   
  
 Apparently not, because he had just shagged her every which way he could bend her. The mattress was only partially on the bed now, threatening to spill her onto the floor. The bed was so high up that she was sure she’d die from the fall if the Doctor weren't there blocking the path to her demise. She giggled to herself at the thought. Death by falling because you got shagged by the man who you’ve always been curious about. Yep, that would be the way to go!   
  
“You not allowed to giggle like that,” He grumbled.  
  
“I am so. Especially after…”  
  
“I know. Don’t remind me. I get tired just thinking about it.”  
  
She couldn't help but laugh at his weariness. "That’s makes two of us.”   
It was true. To do that again with him would be her death. She was lucky her heart hadn’t jumped out of her chest and started scolding her for the exercise she was going through.   
  
“We should do this again when we’re younger,” he joked.   
  
“How old are you?”  
  
“Older than I was when we were traveling together. I think we landed. Even if we haven’t, I have to get up and search for my brains. They have to be around here somewhere.”  
  
“Let me know if you come across mine as well. I’d like them back.”  
  
He laughed getting up and trounced naked across his bedroom. He started shifting the mattress back into place with her on it. Yep, there was the answer to the question of the universe. Hanging proudly between the great Time Lord's legs. The Doctor had a penis, and he had proved to her that he was quite adept at using it.   
  
For the first time in ages, she wondered what lay in store for them.   
  
That story remains unwritten. But Tegan, found herself looking forward to it.


End file.
